Archive for January, 2010

Numbnuts Strokes His Own Ego

Sunday, January 31st, 2010

Numbnuts Woody Paige

We do ask tough questions. I wish you had sat next to me at the final two press conferences McDaniels had — after the last game and the next day. As a radio guy said to me: “Man, you had the guts to ask the questions the rest of us wanted to.”

Oh is that so Numby, eh? Big man Numbnuts mouthed off to the coach at a press conference. I’d like to meet this “radio guy.” He’s probably some young intern that don’t know any better. You got to be two turds in a paper bag short of running around I-95 bolicky bare-ass in January to look up to Numbnuts at the Denver Post. I’d like to know who this radio guy is, he’s liable to do just about anything if he’s that bad off. I’d like to know who he is, because if I see him on the side of the highway with a flat, I ain’t stopping and that’s for damn sure. You got to be seriously intellectually light to look up to Numbnuts at the Post as some sort of a genius. After his track record of being perennially wrong? After his track record of shifting gears on a dime? I’m convinced some people got short memories — I don’t.

My point is, T-Bone Tebow is cut from the same cloth. He’s smart, tough, a good passer, a great leader, a winner. I think he’d fit perfectly in the McDaniels system — a shotgun quarterback, throwing the short passes, running as a wildcatter and occasionally throwing deep. And he has a great football mind.

But the Broncos won’t draft him. Most teams will stay away because he’s not what the scouts want. Kordell Stewart proved people wrong and became the original Slash.

Here’s another one of Numby’s genius ideas. Yeah, lets draft a glorified H-back with the tenth or eleventh pick in the draft, hell a second rounder would be too much for Tebow. That Tebow ain’t no NFL QB, he is a possible Chris Cooley, if that.

Josh McDaniels

Bowlen "won" with Reeves, he won with Shanahan, he's gonna win with the kid

Yeah that’s right Mcdaniels and the Broncos organization ain’t gonna listen to your “genius” there Numby. Not after you said Ryan Clady wasn’t all that. Not after predicting 4 and 12, 11 and 5 the year before ( for someone who was supposedly “vocal” about getting rid of Shanahan that year, that was an awfully optimistic outlook at the beginning of the season, that’s a tactic of a spineless, weak, wave-riding sea cucumber )

Yeah they ain’t gonna listen when ol’ Numby calls for Chris Simms to start. He’s obviously the better quarterback. Oh and Mike Nolan? I suppose he was the first big mistake of the McDaniels era according to Numby.  Numby said McDaniels was the golden boy and eveything he did was correct. Now Numby’s saying the best coach just left town. Way to stick by your guns eh Numby?

I see those losers at the Post piling on Moreno, what a joke that is. Klis asked the wrong guy on that offensive line about our o-line woes. Clady had nothing to do with it. I wonder if these Moreno bashers even realize they’re setting themselves up for failure. I suppose they take Numbnuts over there seriously, they must feel he’s the resident genius, the real pulse of Broncos information. I suppose Moreno just didn’t find the holes, what a laugh that is. But after all the crazy uncle has dinner with Shanahan, so he knows what the hell is up. All these goobers coming out of the woodwork with their cute lines “NoGain Moreno,” “Noyards” etc. You morons, degenerates and garden variety ignoramuses are going to have egg on your face, but that’s just fine, cause all of a sudden you won’t say nothing. You’ll just quietly blend back in with the sea cucumbers when this kid runs for 1,300 yards and catches for 600. Which is reasonable based on the flashes he showed, his ability to catch the ball brilliantly not to mention his professionalism and leadership.

You know what Shonn Greene has that Moreno doesn’t? Two guards and a center that can run block. You see what the Jets did to that Chargers defensive front? Take note, because the Broncos don’t got that. We don’t have that, the fact that we don’t killed us, and new interior linemen is exactly what we need. Probably the biggest need of this offseason is a new center and a guard, maybe two guards.

But good, I hope you people discount this Moreno left and right. Hopefully I’ll find some losers that will trade away his best rookie cards at a hell of a discount.

Guess what, Broncos? If Ryan had come to Denver, he would have kept the offensive staff intact, would have kept Cutler and would have concentrated on the defensive side of the ball. If the Broncos had hired Ryan, they would have been in the playoffs. But that horse has left the Broncos’ barn.

If this, if that. Why must I pick up a Denver paper and hear a bunch of nonsense about garbage that will never happen?

Numby was all about McDaniels when he anointed him the golden boy mid-season. Proudly throwing out stats how McDaniels was a winner compared to all the other first year coaches. I’m telling you we got a taste of the McDaniels regime in those first six games. Mark my words Josh McDaniels is a winner, he has the mark of a winner. He will be around a long, long time coaching the Broncos.

Jay "Huckdort" Cutler

Jay "Huckdort" Cutler

Suppose we did keep the offense intact. We’d have an un-coach-able pick throwing gooned out doofus at quarterback. We’d probably be trying to trade Cutler all over again. I’m glad we did when the griddle was hot. We got great value when the world called Huckdort a shining example of a Pro Bowler. All along I knew he was a poor man’s Favre. That Hucky is tarnished baby, he is tarnished with them picks big time. Unbelievable. And they are killers. Always seems to happen to Hucky at the worst possible time you can imagine too. He just loves them dorts, I can’t see him ever getting over his addiction to dorting and dorting heavy baby. I heard something funny while passing by a Chicago paper. I heard they ain’t looking for any upgrades at wide receiver. And I thought we had a doofus columnist at the Denver Post. What a laugh riot that one was. I think these arrogant, lazy journalist types are an epidemic. They are what’s killing these newspapers.

Second, we’d be trading Marshall away now regardless. This upcoming trade or release has zero to do with Huckdort not being here. It has zero to do with Huckdort and everything to do with Brandon Marshall. We can’t get rid of him fast enough as far as I’m concerned. I notice a bunch of geniuses coming out of the woodwork saying we ought to get a first rounder, a third rounder and even a player in return for Marshall.

These people remind me of the poor souls that put Zhu Zhu pets up for three hundred dollars a pop on auction in December. People are stupid, but nobody’s paying that much. Those damn things sat on the shelf and the poor saps ended up having to cover the auction costs at the end. Even garden variety misdemeanor level ignoramus buyers have a quarter of a brain left. Imagine you’re a GM in this league: you’re gonna give away a first round pick, a third round pick plus a good player and then turn around and have to pay out the ass for Brandon Marshall? On top of all that? With his team poisoning antics and list of infractions? With his overrated abilities? Part of me does solemnly hope someone is that utterly desperate and moronic.

Asking the world for Marshall could be a mistake, if we ask too much he’ll just sit and other teams will too. It’s more like we got a damaged Zhu Zhu and the holiday rush is over. Cut your losses and get what you can. I’m hoping for a first rounder at best, either that or a straight up trade for a player. I’ll tell you right now I’ll be happy in either scenario. Wherever he goes it’s just a matter of time for them to find out about the great Brandon Marshall. Might take a year, but it will just be a matter of time before the meltdown occurs in some way, shape or form.

I heard that Denver Post is filing for bankruptcy, eh? These papers are sinking and sinking fast. You got Numby over here blowing hoagies out his ass, probably sitting in the stall of some filth-ridden Taco Bell while he should be at training camp. Throwing out barbs and bombs left and right at our team, trying to sharpshoot our coach left and right like that gooned out loser Ron Borges.

They ought to make me in charge of that newsroom. I’d bring it to damn greatness. I’d fire Numbnuts on the first day and split his wages among two highly competent and professional bloggers in our Broncos blogosphere. At least we’d have people in there that are committed, competent, thorough and who like the team. Instead of someone’s crazy uncle Numby that has a whiny personal vendetta against the coach. That Numby ought to be fired for conduct detrimental to the team.

Randy "Macho Man" Savage

Randy Savage

Then I’d get Randy “Macho Man” Savage out of retirement. The genius of the Macho Man was cut off from the public’s eye much too early. You people think I’m messing around, eh? I’d grab a HD camera and cruise around Colorado with him and a few babes. We’d go around busting up cars and ruining some of the tv production sets for some of these lame local advertisements. We’d make them film it and run it. Then we’d ride around throwing produce and bottles while verbally pressuring any fans we saw wearing other teams apparel, we’d pressure them into committing to the Broncos instead. You kidding me? That’s some quality entertainment with limitless potential. I came up with that in five seconds. No limit to what I could do there. Think about that next time you slog through one of Numby’s new turdlets of wisdom.

Categories : Broncos News
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Broncos Promote Wink Martindale to Defensive Coordinator

Thursday, January 28th, 2010

The Broncos named linebackers coach Wink Martindale their new defensive coordinator.

Wink Martindale

“He’s earned this opportunity. Our system won’t change, our philosophy won’t change. He’s a very aggressive coach. This is a great day for the Denver Broncos. Defensively, we will keep our system consistent in terms of the scheme and will play an aggressive, physical brand of football. – McDaniels”

Same system, same philosophy. The system and the players matter most.

Don Martindale

Looks like we got a steak eater, it's an upgrade folks.

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Broncos Could Draft Running Back in Later Rounds

Tuesday, January 26th, 2010

Frank Schwab over at the Colorado Gazette thinks the Broncos ought to target a running back in the mid to late rounds.

Like I responded, I believe the same thing, we need a good young slugger to compliment Moreno. I don’t believe our problem last year was Knowshon Moreno, as some people want to dub him a bust  after one season. Jerome Bettis in his prime would have trouble getting one yard running up the middle for the Broncos in 2009. This nonsense that Moreno “just didn’t find the holes,” being floated out there is a joke. He’s a player, he’ll improve and more importantly our offensive line, the interior of that line must improve. Moreno showed flashes of greatness, he’s got moves, he catches brilliantly, he’ll be a player for us for years to come. I am glad he’s playing for us and not the Chargers where he would  kill us for years catching those dinks from Philip Rivers.

One of my wishes for 2010 is a good young slugger to compliment Moreno, maybe some guy in the mid rounds. 6’1 230 who can just hold on to that football and grind out hard yardage. I’m not wild about having two finesse backs splitting the majority of the carries. My hope is Moreno gets the majority of the carries, gets spelled by Buckhalter, and we get a new young tough guy for grinding the short yards. Hillis, I don’t know what the hell is up with him, I think he said something bad about the coach’s wife and there you have it, he’s done.  He’ll probably be a Redskin in 2010.

Categories : Broncos News
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Dean Pees on the Ravens in Baltimore

Tuesday, January 26th, 2010

The Patriots Dean Pees is headed off to Baltimore to be their linebackers coach. Looks like we will promote our very own Wink Martindale from linebackers coach to defensive coordinator. Fine by me, the system is already in place.

In other news, the Broncos suspected Miami of tampering with Mike Nolan but didn’t care. Nor should they, you got people acting like we just lost a Hall of Fame coach.

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Farewell to Favre – King of the Huckdorts

Sunday, January 24th, 2010


Was shocked to hear Terry Bradshaw claim Brett Favre was the best quarterback he’s ever seen. Then again Bradshaw is a hokey old doofus resigned to fried pickle commercials these days and he’s made no effort to hide his QB bias throughout the years.

I know this is a Broncos site, but let me throw this one at you: It’s the fourth quarter, its fourth and ten on your own 20 with two minutes to go. Your offensive line sucks, your running game is mediocre at best and your wide receivers are average to below average.

Who do you pick for your quarterback? Favre, Montana, Marino, Elway?

I sure as hell pick Elway. He could kill you with his mobility, he could throw like a nut and although he had his share of dorts, he wasn’t nearly the dorter Favre was, not in the big games, not in the closing minutes with the game on the line.

Bradshaw never liked Elway, always playing him down, getting in his little snide comments.

Finally we can put to rest the media’s addiction to Brett Favre, the greatest Huckdort to ever play the game. Favre was dorting years before Jay Huckdort Cutler.

In case we ain’t clear, Pro Bowl Jay “Hucks” the ball and “Dort” he gets picked off at the worst possible, team killing moment.

I’ve told you people time and time again Jay Huckdort is a poor man’s Favre.

Favre managed to get to a couple Super Bowls and won one, what was that thirteen years ago? I don’t care how long he’s hung around trying to break records, there is no hiding his tendency to dort badly in the big games; this plagued him throughout his career. Huckdort up there in Chicago’s got them dort tendencies too, like getting picked off at the worst possible time you can imagine.

That’s why Huckdort ain’t even close to being in Favre’s shoes, old Favre managed to win a decent share of games at least.

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Dumervil Could Follow Nolan? – Bunch of BS

Sunday, January 24th, 2010

Talk about an “attention grabbing” headline. You think the Broncos are going to let go of the only player on their team who sacks the damn quarterback?

Elvis Dumervil

I’ve lost a little respect for that Schefter now that he’s in that trash heap of stupidity ESPN and he’s holding a hat out, charging money for his latest “news.” Screw that.

Now we have a stupid headline here, Elvis Dumervil could follow Nolan to Miami. Why the hell would Dumervil want to leave the Broncos anyways? It’s probably that stupid notion that the entire success of the defense, every last little nuance of our defense was Mike Nolan and now that he’s gone its surely doomed to mediocrity. I’m betting anything Dumervil doesn’t believe that. Only a bunch of sea cucumbers in the press.

The only way in the world we let Dumervil go, the only way that happens is if the Broncos somehow get a Julius Peppers. Bottom line, it’s a reach and a half and kind of a stupid one at that.

We pay Dumervil, and I am sure he’s happy in Denver.

You can’t replace Dumervil, or better yet, you had better have a plan to replace him with someone equally productive right now if you were to let him go. And that sure as hell don’t mean a draft pick.

You can replace Brandon Marshall’s production, I won’t miss his numbers when we can actually run the football when it counts and I won’t miss his locker room cancer when we split his production between a couple players. That’s a few reasons he’s gone besides the obvious trouble he’s been.

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McDaniels Addresses His Detractors

Sunday, January 24th, 2010

Josh McDaniels Broncos
Who are many, and like sea cucumbers they go with the dumbed down flow and hang on guy’s like Numbnuts every word. Numbnuts who’s window on reality is about one day wide.

“Our running game and some of the things we’re going to do next year will definitely change,” Broncos coach Josh McDaniels said Saturday night.

McDaniels is on top of the situation and knows our running game killed us last year. Especially the blocking. I don’t believe for a second it was “Knowshon Moreno’s inability to find holes,” what a joke. I suppose an “inability to hit the hole” is why opposing teams tackles were trouncing him in the backfield. I suppose Buckhalter, Hillis and Jordan were finding the holes all day out there.

And so Barone, Wylie and Studesville were hired to help alter the Broncos’ running game that will feature second-year tailback Knowshon Moreno and possibly include one or two new offensive linemen.

The meat of my want list: run blocking offensive linemen in that interior. We better get one or two, it should be more like two. The players are what matter there, we need some new ones in that interior.

“People want to say things, but no, I’m not hard to work with. The 99 percent of people I work with and get along with very well, they know what the heck is going on inside the Denver Broncos’ building. People who have had an issue with me, or I’ve had an issue with, there’s a reason. I’m not going to let things happen that shouldn’t happen. If that’s what people want, then maybe we disagree.”

Well the sea cucumbers who don’t have a mind of their own, the sea cucumbers that go wherever the tide or writers like Numbnuts takes them, they think everything is McDaniels fault. I mean, the Marshall and Scheffler benching, that was McDaniels ego 100% putting himself above the team. What a joke, I seen these lazy writers left and right around the nation trying to hammer McDaniels for that. I supposeit would have been just wonderful if McDaniels let Marshall cause trouble because he’s the “star player,” I wonder if it ever once occurred to these sea cucumbers what kind of message that sends to the team, to the young players?

That’s why I hate bad information, I hate losers in positions of editorial power who think they’re cute, that have an axe to grind against the coach, hitting and running with their little nonsense pieces in the paper. They don’t take no stands, they can’t see the big picture, they just pontificate on day by day happenings. When things are going good I suppose McDaniels is the golden boy who can do no wrong. The minute there’s some adversity the sky is falling.

I wish they were this fickle with Huckdort.

They are unfortunately representing the “finest” Broncos journalists in the city’s largest paper and their poor logic gets picked up around the nation by morons, dimwits, degenerates and general slugs. Maybe people like Numbnuts at the Post realize most people ain’t that smart. I on the other hand, I give them the benefit of the doubt at least. My words are iron and I will not be bifurcated. I am a bona fide oracle and a genius and I know my team.

The defensive philosophy that we use, that’s ours. That’s not going anywhere. It’s our second year in the system, and we’ll continue to do better. I have a lot of respect for Mike, and I wish him well. But I think this is going to be the best thing for the Broncos and the best thing for Mike Nolan. I think everybody wins in this.”

Once again, why I didn’t mind Nolan cruising off into the sunset: The system is in place. It’s not going to be changed drastically, whether it ends up Pees or that Wink Martindale.

McDaniels is the brightest young coach in the NFL, he is a winner, he has the mark of a winner and if some of you people don’t like it, you better learn to love it because he’s gonna be around a long time. Maybe some of yous who think otherwise should start hitching your wagons to the Redskins, now that Chicago doesn’t look like such a grandiose option.

Categories : Broncos News
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Bob Wylie, Clancy Barone to Coach Broncos Offensive Line

Friday, January 22nd, 2010

Things are moving along, we need all the help we can get on that offensive line, which was truly offensive, the interior at least. We got big, athletic All Pro caliber bookends, now we need some giant road graters in that interior.

Denver Post: Bob Wylie, a long-time NFL assistant who has spent the last three years in the Canadian Football League, will be an assistant offensive line coach as will Clancy Barone, who coached the team’s tight ends this past season.

Went down to Sam’s Club and got a 70 dollar prime rib. You see them steakhouses charging twenty dollars, thirty dollars a pop for sparrow sized portions, eh? Got one of these, carved it up, threw some in the freezer; I’ll be eating inch and a half steaks for a month. Twenty dollar steak, eh? You gotta be kidding me. Not to mention they don’t even clean the silverware proper. You got mental defectives urinating in the mashed potatoes, people spitting in the mayonnaise. If you don’t think they’re doing it in them fancy restaurants too, you got another thing coming. These people won’t rook me and laugh in the prep kitchen. Seen it, heard it, I know it happens. And often. And that’s for damn sure.

I’ll do a lot of things, but I am handsome, comely, immaculate, and not in the least homely or plain. I won’t mess with somebody’s food. You’ve got to be a lowlife degenerate to get off on that nonsense.

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